Tips for Resolving Conflict

1. Have a point(s):
   
   What is the expected result of the confrontation?
   What is really making you angry?
2. Timing is Everything!
   
   Plan a time to talk when you have plenty of time, privacy, and are feeling calm.
3. Stay Focused:
   
   Keep your voice calm and steady; take long, steady breaths, take a "time out" if you feel yourself escalating; own-up to your feelings and beliefs.
4. Stay on Issue:
   
   Only discuss the issue at hand. Don't get personal, insult or use foul language. Avoid making global accusations ("you always/never"); be specific in your concerns.
5. Compromise:
   
   Agree to disagree; don't try to "win" or change someone's mind. Accept responsibility for your thoughts and feelings.
   Tolerate diversity and/or ambiguity. 

© Tran & Taylor, 2000 (Modified from Mental Health Association, Tulsa, Arizona.)